March | Spring Equinox, Tending to Your Inner Flame, Cyclical Healing, Yarrow, Coyote Medicine

May we sensually bathe in the bounty of the sun's rays, as it warms the crisp spring air, that shares whispers of renewal to our skin. When the rain's showers fall, may we be invited to glide our hands down our body, tracing the cascade from rain's showers against the sacred temple our heart beats in.

The transition into spring has to be one of my most treasured seasonal shifts. Fall and Winter are always so packed with emotional processing, deep conversations with my shadow, and lots of REST. Spring is a time of fertility, growth, celebration, and renewal. As you read on, I will be sharing with you some things that support just that. Imagine in your mind's eye your internal ecosystem. What is the color, the texture, the smell, the temperature, of the soil your roots grow in. What mycelium, multi-legged beings, and plant matter exist there? I invite you now to envision the landscape that is your body. The ridges of the top of your hips being the curves of the surface of the earth, and what descends below the navel is all that exists underground. Your sacrum being the central root, with extending roots reaching down your legs, around your ankles, and out each toe. So much can exist beneath the surface. We can trick ourselves in believing that what isn't seen, isn't really in our experience. All that is not in our external reality, isn't in our energetic field. Coyote asks, "Is that true for you?" I'm turning the soil to reveal that there is so much existing deep within you that no one but you, can truly see. All that was once nourishment will decompose, break down, and turn into vital nutrients for your growth and rebirth to take place. All that has caused immense challenge in your life, has the capability to hold the bitter medicine that you'll seasonally take. When we learn to recognize the medicinal value of challenge, we harvest it, place it in a vessel to hold its potency, and witness the alchemy as over time the true medicine is extracted. We are now feeling the transformation that has taken place from the distillation of Fall + Winter's lessons. Whether you feel yourself identifying with the one integrating the bitter medicine of the colder months, or you are the cold wet soil feeling the sun's rays reaching for your growth; evolution, healing, and change is emerging.

During the Spring Equinox on 3/20, Ostara in earth centered / Pagan traditions, I taught a workshop called 'Tending to Your Inner Sacred Flame'. I guided those in circle on a somatic journey, into the cave of the pelvic bowl. Our pelvis houses our Root energy center. Our Root connects us to our foundational memories around safety, pleasure, passion, trust, receptivity, creation, and primal instinct. When an experience triggers us, our body sends a signal straight down to our Root in order to respond. Once triggered or feeling robbed of safety, we instinctively react in a way that our body remembers from our first experience, that had caused a similar sensation. As we age emotional patterns continue to build, and we can often find ourselves missing the much needed opportunities to reflect on how these experiences feel in our body. We miss the time to process, to integrate, to shed, and to let go. Over time our root can hang on to past experiences / trauma, thus creating debris in our energetic root channel. Some examples leading to physical challenges that can occur when energetic debris build in our Root: stagnation / limited range of motion within the pelvis, menstrual cycle challenges, hormonal imbalance, inconsistency in digestion, a lost connection to sensuality, and challenges with circulation. In the same ways that nature releases the growth from it's previous seasons, we can do this within our body by tending to our Root energy center. Those with menstrual cycles naturally release monthly as well, and I believe there are more ways where every b o d y can develop a cyclical rhythm to release monthly. With or without a Uterus. The shifts of seasons, the cycles of the moon, the changing of the tides, can all display a reflection to shed and release. There are several ways to invite in the energy of the sun into our body, to illuminate what we are ready to release. We can even envision what happens during a wildfire if that connection resonates more to you. Roots can smolder beneath the surface of the earth long after the fire above has settled. Once those roots have turned to ash, what was left of them turns into nutrients, and the space from where they once remained creates an opening for new growth to occur. In the 'Tending to Your Inner Sacred Flame' workshop, we began with a candle visualization practice to be able to hold the vision of the flame in our mind, as we descended through the energetic channels of the body leading to our Root. By working with this practice, you can really gain clarity on what is being illuminated, what is smoldering beneath the surface, or what has turned to ash so that new roots can reach far and wide. When we illuminate a past trauma, we often can feel the response to that trauma move within the body. We can feel ourselves detaching, freezing, lashing out, dissociating, becoming angry, waves of tears, whatever the remembered response to the trauma may be. A trigger provides an opportunity for us to redefine our truth in our present day experience. Most often when we are triggered, it is a way to directly communicate with our Root, and check-in with ourselves to see if that trigger still rings true. We can sense if there is still medicine there to take, or if it is debris that we can release and allow to decompose, or smolder to ash. If the trigger causes you to feel unsafe, what were your fundamental experiences around safety? How could you open up a conversation with that age / version of you that went through the fundamental experience that caused the trigger? Doing so teaches the body that in your present moment, you have the capability to advocate for yourself in way that the past version of you didn't. When we are attuned to our body, we give our wounds an opportunity to speak. We can give them the care they have always needed. We can provide ourselves the reclamation of choice. When I feel into the sensation of choosing to exist within the energy of past trauma, or to choose a different response, I feel the presence of Coyote. Coyote is most commonly known as being the 'trickster' in animal spirit medicine. When we imagine being tricked, there is a huge sensation of disconnection from our body, what we have believed to be true, and we are being stretch in the middle. This can feel extremely debilitating at times. This experience of being 'tricked' is something most of us have had happened at least once in our life, it projects out an energy that turns us away from the vital medicine Coyote is here to teach. There is actually a very strong value to Coyote's medicine and our cyclical ways of healing. Healing is not linear, there will be cycles in our lives where we need to check-in with our Root and redefine what is true, if past trauma / pain re-presents itself. We must learn to not be 'tricked' by our traumas if they resurface. Perhaps we learn to treat them as an invitation to either release, or reclaim aspects of ourselves that felt lost. Coyote provides us with the opportunity to reclaim our discernment. If we are triggered by another and it brings up a trauma response from our past, we have the choice to play out that past response. When you feel a trigger build, you have the choice to express the emotions you're feeling, and communicate that you need space to process what is moving through you, before engaging further. This has been a topic I have brought up in a few letters now, and still feel the potency in sharing this lesson. You will lock eyes with Coyote, or hear their yip early in the morning, when an invitation to check-in on truth presents itself. Either in dreams, out in nature, watch for the synchronicity of Coyote's appearance in your life. My intention with bringing Coyote's medicine into this month's letter is to provide an even bigger opening within you as you tend to your rooted connection with t r u t h . There is so much shared through the media, news, educators, healers, practitioners, coaches, doctors, and those you seek for guidance. Heck, please even question the information I share with you! If something doesn't resonate, or it causes an uncomfortable sensation in your body, tap into your inner knowing. We are in a NEW AGE, 'trusted' systems are falling, a Guru is still human. We must continue to strengthen our connection to our communities and our ancestral culture. We must collectively release the weight of years of cultural oppression and uplift forgotten ancient ways of living. With the knowledge of our current day, we can make regenerative change as we come together in our array of lineages, to mend our broken ways of connecting / living so that we can strongly support the earth and each other. We are collectively moving in a direction demanding more of our own research, intuitive guidance, and primal instinct. Always check-in with yourself to re-establish your t r u t h, and how the information you receive externally is supporting or aligning with that inner truth. The truth that nourishes, and supports accessibility to your Root. The truth that honors the growth and resilience of your community. Truth that is raw, and not always comfortable to engage with. The last 3 years brought in so many deep trauma responses in my body. If I were to continue to believe in those experiences, the folks circling them; there would have been no integration, no growth, just a repeat of the same internal season. What would happen in nature if the same season repeated over and over and over again? By redefining / renewing our truth in grounded presence, we give ourselves recognition for how much has evolved during our growth, and our collective growth. We set a new tone. The color of our leaves change, blooming throughout our inner landscape takes place, our rapids roar, and we get to bask in that beauty.

When we reach a new cycle in our healing, we must learn that is a reset time for all. Spring is a time of renewal not only in nature, it is also a time of renewal in our body. It is time to renew your boundaries, your friendships, your relationships, your needs, your capacity to connect, who and what gets the divine opportunity to grow along side you in the ecosystem of LIFE. Yarrow is a plant teacher that begins reaching it's feather like leaves towards the sun in Spring. Closer to the Summer months you can see the cream, umbrella shaped heads, with small white flowers arching over it's central stalk. Yarrow is to be found along the coastal borders, heels of canyons, winding roadsides, and subalpine zones. Yarrow is a healer, a beacon for blood flow, a wound tender, and energetically an embodiment of boundaries. We can hear Yarrow's whisper when we are energetically needing clarity around personal boundaries and connection. Yarrow is very affirming for those who feel a tenderness from recent healing that has taken place emotionally, and can provide support in protection as one is ready to open themselves to connecting in a deeper way. Yarrow is also helpful for those who identify with being a 'chameleon' in social settings, if one may be feeling vulnerable to stand firm in newly developed integrity. If any of the words above resonated with you, I invite you to follow that call to Yarrow's guidance. Always research plant identification before wildcrafting, and / or respectfully harvest with someone who is experienced in the plant medicine world. I am closing this month's letter in celebration of the Full Moon, as well as a new offering that is beginning to sprout from my internal soil. I will be sharing more of these details in next month's letter to you, and I am very excited to continue weaving in earth medicine to assist in connecting with the body. I am so grateful for your consistency and presence in my life, as well as my practice. It is so important to me to continue sharing with you, and I appreciate your support endlessly. With love, Abbie